I am not one of those lunatics that thinks Die Hard is the best Christmas movie ever made, that title clearly belongs to It's A Wonderful Life. Off the top of my head I would slot Die Hard in at number 4, behind White Christmas and National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, right ahead of A Christmas Story. This is of course in a world in which the original animated The Grinch That Stole Christmas is not considered a movie and is simply a cartoon special. All that being said it is September and my Christmas talk is almost expired so let's get back to the whole point of this post: There is a Die Hard Christmas book coming out, and it looks amazing.

Based on the fourth best Christmas movie ever, written in the style of "The Night Before Christmas" by the amazingly named Doogie Horner, A Die Hard Christmas is set to be released on October 17th. Presumably every living person in America will at least try to buy this book so I would strongly recommend hopping on the live pre-order over at Amazon immediately since they probably didn't print enough copies for every household across the world. 

Cameron Crowe is a national treasure and Jerry Maguire is a great film. You can argue those two statements if your heart is no good, but we can all agree that the idea of reading the mission statement Jerry writes sounds intriguing. Although I have scoured the sewers of the interwebs for as long as I can remember, I somehow never got the memo, or mission statement rather, to look through the Jerry Maguire section of Crowe's awesome blog The Uncool. Problem solved and mission statement access is here.

The closing part with the most importance for understanding Crowe, Maguire's departure and, in theory, yourself is as follows

I am prepared to die for something. I am prepared to live for our cause. The cause is caring about each other. The secret to this job is personal relationships.

Truth bomb. Can someone send this to the President?

Being in on the joke is one of the great joys in life, being on the outside is one of the great annoyances. Have you ever heard of a little film starring Lisa Kudrow and Damon Wayans called Marci X? Well neither had I until today, but boy oh boy does it have some of that special sauce. Let's all get on the inside of this joke by way of the super original and not even remotely tired plot summary:

A Jewish-American Princess is forced to take control of a hard-core hip-hop record label and tries to rein in one of the label's most controversial rappers.

As the film was made in 2003, very much a Kudrow friendly era, and produced by big-time producer Scott Rudin, it's sort of hard to figure out how I had never heard of this movie. At the time I was in film school and, as I had been for the decade prior, watching movies was sort of my thing, quality be damned. Either way the whole existence of this film basically zig zagged it's way around my long reaching consumption tentacles. Maybe that was a good thing as, if the trailer can be trusted, this movie simply came fourteen years too early. Now is the time we all rally around and support the great Marci X.

Equal pay for women, that's covered here. Casual racism and nepotism, you got it. Bringing together the community? Nobody knows how to do that better than rich white women and their friends. This is the story we all need to see before we can truly Make America Great Again. So I beg of you President Trump, let us make Marci X our national film. That 9% rating on Rotten Tomatoes is simply from a long forgotten era.

I lived in LA for a long time and left this year. Had life not gotten in the way I would have been at this concert. Ryan Adams is my cat's meow or pajamas or what have you. I also got a phone call from John Mayer a long time ago where he basically told me to never give up. I will never forget that and take an odd satisfaction in the fact that it even occurred. Suffice to say my heart cried a little, after the immediate jubilation, upon hearing the news that Mayer invited Adams up for a joint take on the latter's "Come Pick Me Up" at The Forum last week. We even get Mayer to handle a verse on vocals. It's fantastic.

Now go tour together or add Ryan to that Dead & Company group. I am pretty sure he knows the songs.

Super Hella Awesome Update: Some lovely twitter user commented that he would love to see Adams and Mayer do a project together after this took place. Adams replied with words that set my heart aflutter. "It'll happen eventually. And it'll be awesome." Not one to be outdone Mayer replied "Co-signed" and included what I think is an emoji, but not of a wave.

I think I've got the feels.

Better Off Dead is a really great movie. Stenner Glen is a really great band. The marriage was almost too obvious.

Possibly astonishing sidenote: Did you know that the Asian Howard Cossell announcer guy, played by Yuji Okumoto, was the bad guy in Karate Kid 2? They just don't teach that kind of range anymore, not to mention that sort of enunciation.

For those that would like some more tidbits, like the hot French exchange student also appearing as Bill S Preston's girlfriend in Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, this awesome article at Pajiba should do you good. I appreciate how it appears in the mindhole blowers section.

Fully admitting that may of them are valid, I'd like to think I am in the majority with my general belief that we celebrate too many causes. As with all things in life that sometimes wander my mind, South Park gloriously broached the subject with their version of a Dr. Seuss story "A Scause For Applause". Without ruining much you can see some greatness in the episode summary:

A serious doping scandal shakes everyone's faith in a beloved icon. Everyone who once supported the fallen hero is now cutting off their symbolic yellow wristbands.

Oh Lance Armstrong, you Icarus you. Suffice to say when I was informed today was National Penguin Day I thought of three things: tuxedo shirts, Morgan Freeman and the aforementioned South Park episode.

Sometimes you feel like you know what's going to happen during an internet search. It was with this feeling that I soon learned how dumb I really was about scauses. Today is apparently all of these things:

• DNA Day
• East Meets West Day
• Hairstylists Appreciation Day
• National Crayola Day
• National Mani-Pedi Day
• National Telephone Day
• National Plumber's Day (Also known as Hug A Plumber Day!)
• Parental Alienation Awareness Day
• Red Hat Society Day
• School Bus Drivers' Day
• World Malaria Day
• World Penguin Day

Wow, April 25th. You really bring the thunder.

It is with this newfound awareness of my lack of awareness that a new feature has been birthed upon this section of the interwebs: Holiday Reviews. I'll do my best to make your parents uncomfortable and drink too much, figuratively speaking I am sure.

As longtime fans of the great David Hasselhoff's musical prowess, it seemed only right to celebrate the site's return with some of the soothing sounds of the Hoff. Let's Go Hoffing shall we....

Like every great ballad, "Du" starts with the Hoff doing some spoken word while walking along the beach in a very sexy outfit. Unfortunately he sang this song in some weird language so it was never the Grammy winner it was destined to be. Thankfully we can watch the video with or without sound. I'm not really sure which is the better option. Kidding obviously, listen to those pipes bro.

It is with a overflowing cup of gratitude that I am here to tell you I have returned from my quest. The jungle was not nice, nay pleasant, but it met me with my one true love, the elusive Heart of Danza. Now my time away was not without it's costs - financial, emotional, physical - but a cost I would gladly repay again, aside from the missing limbs which I shall not be able to again provide, to see the great sight mine eyes hath saw.

It is with this renewed vigor and passion that Super Hella Awesome has been relaunched into the wild, like a donkey looking for his birth mother at a donkey show. These are the days of our lives. Play it again Sam.

(I missed you guys.)